If you are a parent feeling tired and overwhelmed by the thought of trying to teach your precious little one how to sleep through the night, then you've come to the right place.

Working with young children can be challenging and intimidating, but it doesn’t have to be!

Research has shown that positive reinforcement techniques within a framework known as “Zone of Proximal Development” (or ZPD) is one of the most effective ways for parents – or any caregiver – to help their child learn new skills in a supportive environment.

Using ZPD strategies means finding a balance between providing enough support so your child won't get discouraged, while still pushing them just enough past their current abilities so they can stay challenged, engaged, and learning throughout this sleep training journey.

Think of this as the “sweet spot” where learning occurs.

We can do some tasks independently, others we can't do even with assistance, and then there are tasks where we can do them with some help (that's our zone of proximal development).

For optimal learning, we should be working in that zone - the one where we need some support, but not too much.

If it's too easy, we're not really learning anything. But if it's too hard, we'll get discouraged.

Success in learning a new skill happens when we are being pushed just a little beyond what we can currently do.

When it comes to sleep training for your baby, there are two main things you should keep in mind to help ensure success:
It should be productive and show progress over time.


1. By "productive," I mean that when you're giving your baby the time and space to try to fall asleep on their own, we want to see lots of variability in their protesting. This can range from whimpers and coos all the way up to 8-10/10 crying, but we want to make sure they are able to bring themselves back down within a few moments so they spend more time in the 1-5/10 range.

2. By “Progress” I mean we want to see signs of self-soothing, which might include things like sucking on their hands, kneading the crib sheet or clothing, shaking their head side to side, lifting their legs up and kicking down on the crib mattress, or moving their body/limbs to create motion.

It's important that you trust your instincts and your baby. If at any point they seem dysregulated like level 10 crying with no de-escalation for several minutes, then you should respond and offer support.

Remember: if they're dysregulated, they're most likely not in their zone of proximal development.

It's important to remember that progress isn't always linear!

When you're first starting out, you may see initial progress on the first few days followed by some rough patches, or maybe only a few small wins at the beginning and then bigger wins later on.

To help you keep track of the progress being made, I recommend you keep a “sleep log” where you record all the details about your child's sleep.

After 3-5 days, you should see some wins, and after 5-7 days, there should be clear progress. If you're seeing progress, then you can keep going with the approach you're using. But, if you're not seeing that progress, then you’ll want to shift what you're doing.